In the course of the last 24 hours, there are a few observations I have made about myself, others’ websites and my own:
1. I am quite fortunate to have an intact, still married, happy family. As do a lot of my current friends. The divorce, death and life tragedy rates out there are much more than 50% and I have yet to be affected by any of them in my immediately family.
2. My design skills lack something to be desired. Yet for this being my first attempt at a website in the past four years and considering that it’s my first using any sort of WYSIWYG software I’d say it’s quite remarkable.
3. I am much less read than others. Although I sit in front of a bookshelf overflowing with books I have probably only read half of them. The other half has not been read or has only been half read. Perhaps that’s because sitting and reading is pretty difficult for me, in part because my attention span can usually only last past one magazine article. The other part is because my parents were always encouraging me to ‘go outside’ instead of read or watch TV.
4. It’s quite possible that Ry will never contribute to this website – although I made it for both of us -- simply because he doesn’t want to ‘dwarf’ his other half. Ha.
5. If I start to buy fall clothing when the weather gets cool, just about the time that JCrew sweater arrives in the mail the temperature will skyrocket into the nineties so that I will not be able to wear it until JCrew actually puts the sucker on clearance, thereby making me regret my impulsiveness to buy the new season's clothes.

posted by paula 11:32 PM

Ever have a random memory recalled at the weirdest time? I was just reading a blog when I remembered something from my pre-adolecent years. I used to be a latch-key kid (and proudly so). When I was little, my mother had the 'luxury' of working from home while I staggered up the driveway after kindergarten, although looking back I don't know how much of a luxury it actually was. I nagged her constantly, unaware of the pressures she might have had while sitting at that desk. A few years later, when I was old enough to get home on my own she returned to work in the new building that her and my father's company was housed. I wasn't lonely after school, by any means. I had Mr. Rogers, He-Man, She-Ra, the Thundercats and a faithful german shepherd named Denver all waiting for me when I got there. Still, I would call her just about every day shortly after I got home. I don't know if she remembers this, but on a very frequent basis I would sing the first line of the chorus of "I Just Called to Say I Love You" to her. At the time I thought it was rather witty, but now that I'm grown and have had jobs of my own I realize just how annoying that daily phone call could be. Especially if it comes in the middle of trying to finish payroll for a small company.
I was an odd child. Maybe my mother sees it differently.

posted by paula 10:32 AM

What?? Fast-food is fattening? Get my lawyer on the phone.

posted by paula 2:52 PM

Items Friday has eaten in his short two years of life, and survived:
· Two Clinique chubby sticks, in colors ‘sweetheart’ and ‘nude’.
· One Clinique lipliner in color ‘nude’.
· Two emory boards.
· One ant trap (of the Raid variety).
· All the paper that could be generated by the trees in the Rocky Mountain National Forest.
· One Clinique Barely lipstick in color ‘just gorgeous’ – metal tube included.
· Various carpet remnants that may be licked up.
· Carpet padding
· Two large bags of Easter candy, wrappers included (of the M&M, Snickers and Kit Kat varieties).
· One chocolate Powerbar.
· One DVD of the movie ‘Best In Show’ (not completely digested)
· Assorted garbage
And just this weekend:
· One 40-count pack of Dan’s Powdered sugar doughnuts
I’m convinced he’s invincible and notifying the State Department immediately. A dog like this should be in Afghanistan.

posted by paula 2:12 PM

Remembering September 11th.
As the day approaches, we are now under constant reminder that we stand only “x” number of days from the year anniversary of September 11th. We are currently under bombardment of news reports, company newsletters, e-mails and radio broadcasts as to how the day will be spent, no doubt remembering. It is this that currently bothers me.
Amidst the barrage of questions, lies that one: “How will you spend the day remembering?”
Whereas, I think I might be the only one that wants to forget.

I can’t imagine what it was like for our older generations to live through Vietnam or World War II. I can’t imagine what it felt like for my parents to hear that for the first time a president was assassinated or that the King of Rock ‘n Roll had indeed died. I was even a little too young to fully grasp the effects of the first World Trade Center bombing and was at an ambivalent time of my life when the Oklahoma bombing happened. All I know is that this is the greatest of tragedies that my generation has seen and we assume that it stands the same for those older than us. To us, nothing of greater magnitude has happened or is quite fathomable in the future. That is, barring a full-fledged nuclear war.

I remember that day quite clearly. For me, it’s still very surreal. I was brushing my teeth when I flipped through the news channels. The first plane had already hit and truthfully, the buildings to me were unrecognizable. I’ve never been to New York or for that matter, I probably didn’t even have the Minneapolis skyline memorized. Everyone came home early that day. Glued to the TV. And I remember the skies being eerily silent, save the few fighter jets that sent an almost inaudible whir across the sky.
I remember waking each morning, turning on the TV to see if the “world had blown up over night.” Of course I said these words only half in jest. I remember wondering if our nation would ever be the same now that I had a clinging insecurity following closely behind me wherever I went. But most of all, I remember the sadness -- the almost paralyzing sadness that kept us in front of the TV for a week.

I have remembered all of this for a year. Possibly not everyday, but quite possibly several times a week. Every week. Every week until everyone was found or presumed dead. Every time a company stated its earnings – or lack thereof. Every time I passed yet another magazine at the grocery store. Every time I see yet another news cast about surviving. Every time I hear someone start a sentence with the words ‘since September 11th. . .” And with all this talk about getting ready to remember, I wonder what the hell all the preparation to remember is about when we’re remembering every day.

My point is this: While I know that I can’t and shouldn’t forget in sense that I wipe the slate clean, I don’t want to go back to that time. I don’t want to feel what I did that day, that week, that month and I, as an innocent bystander seem to have those previous emotions so readily available. I can’t imagine how those people feel who lost a spouse or sibling or friend.

Imagine losing a loved one to a freak car accident. Now imagine that you and your family don’t just memorialize the death, but the whole nation does. Or better yet, the world. The months before the anniversary, your co-workers ask how you’ll spend the day. Your neighbor treats you with the utmost kindness and suddenly your loved one’s death becomes idle chit chat over the fence. A trip to the grocery store turns into a walk down memory lane as you read the headlines on how the nation will remember your loss. Most people spend a lifetime memorializing, but it seems that the only thing that moves us past where we are is forgetting. Maybe not forgetting completely, but certainly 'not remembering.’ If you were one of those that was a survivor, wouldn’t you want to forget?

posted by paula 8:07 AM

"I'm going to go make turkey bacon."

Yes, that's how the night was progressing. After tacos and margaritas and my friend Jack Daniels, one must ask "would you like turkey bacon" At least our neighbor Kristen did. (For those who know and have read the blog carefully, I, Ryan am allergic to turkey - add the bacon though, and its one very tempting proposition).

Why the turkey bacon - that’s right, a rerun of Sex in the City.... forget the cosmopolitans, I need turkey.

Paula blogged about the lake...we had a GREAT time - I really wish we were there more often although an 8 hour drive can put a damper on a quick weekend plan. As we were leaving, the wind was "blowing like snot" - the best wind to go windsurfing in...and of course, I'm on the way out of town. So goes the wind.

posted by ryan 10:14 PM

This weekend I attempted to murder my future mother-in-law. It was up at their cabin in North Dakota that I finally found my opportunity, while the family was moving the dock. Seeing a hornet coming towards the dock that we were standing on, I decided to make it look like I was dodging the hornet and bumping into Kathy. The first phase of the plan was a success: I bumped into her hard enough for her to lose her balance and over the dock she went, face down into the mud. I was about jump down and push her farther in when my plans were thwarted by the hornet – I was stung on the arm.
I attempted a second mission on Monday morning, by training the Friday to run with such furry on his leash that he might yank Kathy off the deck, possibly breaking vital bones – but this attempt was unsuccessful as well.
Oh well. Here’s some other pictures from our lovely Labor Day weekend in North Dakota.

posted by paula 8:40 AM