The Home Depot
Move over, Match.com. I am convinced that The Home Depot is the next big dating scene for single women everywhere. This virtual hotbed of home improvement enthusiasts is crawling with single, lonely, able-bodied men looking for women of the same nature and if I were single and looking for a mister, I think I’d seriously consider The Home Depot.
I know this, because since the purchase of our new home, my other half and I have spent many a Saturday afternoon perusing the aisles of The Home Depot. Most of the time we enter the store a cool, collected, knowledgeable bunch and leave a clueless, frustrated mess. Saturday afternoon or not, it is impossible to find any resemblance of help when you are wandering in multiples. However, if I wander a decent distance away from my spouse-to-be, help comes springing from the aisles, always in the form of the opposite sex.

For example, in our last trip we were hunting for the ladder that I wished we would have gotten as a gracious housewarming gift. In addition, we were looking for bike hooks, which we had seen placed at the cashwrap in previous trips, but at that point in time were nowhere to be found. We wandered the aisles for twenty minutes, searching out the item with no luck. Just as we were losing focus and gazing longingly at the assortment of ladders, I wandered no more than ten feet from Ryan and like Batman to thieves, a rather jolly gentleman was inquiring whether I needed help.

So while I’m no longer single, we decided to use this discovery to our advantage: the Home Depot associates clearly cater to single women, rather than couples. So the next time we enter The Depot and need help, I will simply wander a few feet away from my mate and wait.

posted by paula 10:43 PM